Run #1554 Lagunitas the Boulevard of Beery Dreams!

Manhole wearing his best Johnny Appleseed chapeau brought the pack together on Cranleigh Dr. between Sloat Blvd. and Lagunitas Dr. a neighborhood of nice homes and stable families who were about to experience the Gypsies! Before the Gypsies showed up there was plenty of parking, the emphasis is on the “was”! Backside Banger in a rush to become comatose tapped the keg of Lagunitas Hazy Wonder, creating a sharklike drinking frenzy! Pied Piper looked at the piss pounders and averred that tapping the keg was like dropping blood in the water. As the pack stood drinking away there was some concern about the locals watching through their closed blinds, but Jack The Ripper pointed out that living across from Muni track they’re probably used to noise. Pastel Gazelle looked at the revelers and soto voce said, “Not this kind of noise”.  As Wash This Asshole watched Damien The Antichrist and Pot Ho LAH3 arrive he crossed himself and called loudly for a moment of religion! Who better to administer the sacraments than returning Gypsy, Pencil Dick. PD stepped to the podium and reading from the Male Missal brought the pack to a state of grace and in the case of Adopt A Pussy, dampness! Our hare provided a chalktalk that promised a 5.5-mile trail for eagles and 4.5 for turkeys then drawing the marks the pack could expect to see he sent them off to haunt the neighborhood. Our hare took the Lost Patrol under his wing and led them down Sloat Blvd. A photo op was had under the Lagunitas Dr. street sign with roadies raised in honor of the Gypsies’ brewery of choice. The pack including the LP managed to survive crossing 19^th Ave and headed into Stern Grove. As the LP descended into the Grove 5150 kept muttering, “What goes down must come up” but Backside Banger just told him to drink more! There were the usual coyote habitat warning signs and the “This area is closed for repairs” signs for the pack to ignore. Trail took the pack through the Concert Meadow and the parking area below Vale Ave. into the Dog Park area full of happy pooches. Across the park the LP could see Hand Pump pushing on along the trail. As they approached the Children’s Play Area some moms and dads were busy shuttling the moppets away from this group and Fits In slapped Tongueless’ hand for tossing candy to the kiddies. Our hare led the LP past the Trocadero Clubhouse temporarily closed thanks to a tree falling on the roof. Climbing out of the Grove was strangely harder than going into the Grove. Eventually the LP was back at the start and the long haulers weren’t far behind. The little open space area was taken over by the keg and its Cloak Of Invisibility made more invisible by all the Vitamin J strewn on it. Chickenboner was nowhere to be seen but Who’s Your Daddy predicted that she was once again on a photo safari in case Pokémon ever makes a comeback. The Sacred Bucket was filled with Stone Fences a drink much to the hare’s taste! 5 Angry Inches was sweating and not just from the trail when he realized that Tonya Hard On might be bringing the money to back her bet with T. Dr. Kimble was almost blown over by the force of 5AI’s sigh of relief when THO failed to post! THO stated bluntly that she didn’t even remember the bet since she’s apparently been so drunk when she made it but T who would never pass up a chance to make a quick $100 reminded her! Back at the keg the piss pounders were whining that the tap was too hard to pump and getting a growler was tiring Pastel Gazelle so once more the whinging about poor service from T started and he promised to get a new tap. Since the poor things didn’t want to get an upper body workout the keg lived on for a few days. The Sacred Bucket was forced to take up the slack and did so without complaint. T, poor baby, was in a snit, how odd, so he wouldn’t do a Circle. The pack on the other hand was thrilled to be able to keep drinking without listening to T’s dribble! UPDATE: There was nothing wrong with the fucking tap the problem was the halfmind who tapped it didn’t seat the tap right. Cheers.