Welcome, one and all, to Dr. Kimble's pleasure cruise! Men, women, and children of drinking ages are encouraged to join us for this adventure of a lifetime. Tourists will come as far out as the distant East Bay-- right, Slug and Backhoe? Even Squeeze Box will cross the treacherous Golden Gate to make this special event. For the low fee of SEVEN DOLLARS! (Thanks, Muff Daddy), it is sure to be worth your while.

Crawl over the stairs of the Presidio with Dickweed as he has traumatic Dipsea flashbacks. Join Grave Robber as he tests whether any of the Australian bush terrors have swum over to this coast. Gallivant through Definitely Not Poison Oak with John Handcock, explore the empty children's playground with Do Her Well, and admire the scenic backchecks with Cuming Mutha and Gobble My Ass.

Even Muppet Dick will wish for a return visit to the Pet Cemetery, but if you are like Just Doesn't Get It, you can try to hunt for some live ones in the undergrowth. And fear not, Ocean Spray, even in the deepest of forests a spirit guide is sure to appear and set you on your course. Even your virgin will be sure to find her way, Just Jamie, unless she decides to hang out with Circle Jerk.

Travelers will have their choice of adventures, with longer excursions available, especially if you decide on the extended trail with Eat My Pussy. If you are wise like Just Matt, you'll keep your cup in your pants at the ready.

Join Sexxx-Ray and Mary Tyler Whore for some brief refreshments at the beer van, and voyage back to port for some evening entertainments with Cockamole. Gourmet golden corn crisps will be at the ready for snacking, and even Fucker can't complain about that selection. Dick Simmons will snap your photo with Motor Mount and Shaft for a small courtesy fee.

In the mood for some dancing? Tap your feet to the beat of a Crabs original, Fuck Buddy-- and if you need a little liquid encouragement, Hand Pump's caipirinha's will get you in the spirits. Rumple Dick Skin and Peg Me and Lace Me, make it a double.

One and Done will tell you that this trip was not one to be missed. Wash This Asshole proclaimed he had never had a better time that he could remember, and Gloryhole felt only he could have done it better. Tuna on Top said she could not have asked for anything more, although Just Spencer wanted some peanut butter, for some reason.

Future tour dates are sure to be announced soon, so book early and book often.