Once upon a time there lived two hashers in the middle of Forest Hill who went by the names of Cuming Mutha and On All Fours. While they had been hashing for many years, and surely by that time should have known better, they decided to invite the hashers to run and frolic around their home.

“This road is too steep,” Shaft complained as he hiked upwards.

“This road is the wrong direction for driving,” Cockamole pointed out to Tuna.

“This road is just right!” Just Doesn’t Get It reversed his way into position.

Rocky Bowel Movement watched Tonya Hardon and Gobble My Ass pre-run up hills before the hills of the trail, and 9 ½ Wanks traded cheers with Circle Jerk and Wash This Asshole. Boner Marrow squeezed in next to Just Summer to look at Cuming Mutha’s chalk talk.

“This chalk talk’s too narrow,” Vagina Dentata complained.

“This chalk talk’s too wordy,” Medium Sized Ball of Fire peered at the haring advice on SFH3.com.

“Looks just right to me!” Famous Anus dived out of the way of the car barreling down on the marks that Cuming Mutha had moved into the street.

The pack took off none too soon, as there was only so much time to hit up all of the 9000 stairs in the area.

“I’ve only counted 8,000,” groused Do Her Well. “There’s always that one that got away.”

“Definitely too many for me,” laughed Dickweed as he passed with the walkers.

“You all still have energy for talking,” Cuming Mutha pointed out when they came in to the beer check. “Sounds just right.”

“Your whichy ways had too many ways,” King of Bedbugs pointed out.

“I only saw one way,” Five Angry Inches told him.

“Well, that might have been part of the problem,” opined One and Done.

Skid Mark and Peek-a-booby tapped cups as Three Fingers dodged mosquitos.

“I showed up too late for the start,” Mary Tyler Whore said, grabbing a beer from the keg.

“I always come too soon,” Muff Daddy comforted her.  

“Looks like you arrived just in time for cake!” On All Fours gathered them around Cuming Mutha to sing happy birthday and make him a cake.

Cuming Mutha frosted himself with champagne. “Tastes just right to me!”

The End